Usually I write when I'm supposed to be doing homework or studying. Right now I'm supposed to be sleeping, but two guys just knocked on my door trying to sell me eternal life and my advisor just texted me trying to sell me a PhD.
We're in the throes of finals week and I'm just pushing on through the best I can. I've already ruled out doing laundry until after I get my paper and take-home- final done that are due tomorrow night. I also ruled out showering, but I had a presentation today and my hair hadn't been washed in who knows how long, so I eased up on that one. I also had ruled out grocery shopping until this weekend but my refrigerator was empty so I slackened that one as well.
The presentation was on a computer model simulation that I've been fighting with for awhile. I had to plot the data from this model in a foreign computer language (much like trying to write a report in a language you don't know) and it's been a highly stressful couple of weeks. I've been staying at the lab until nearly 9 pm, which is not only late for me, but it's also when the weirdos come out.
The weirdos also come out during finals week for whatever reason. Yesterday University Police sent out texts and emails to alert us of a possible man walking around with a shot gun. It was a couple streets over from my building and I work on the 8th floor where you need two special keys to get in. Later they texted to tell us they located the suspect and that the report was unfounded.
I don't like leaving campus in the dark.
But I've had this presentation due (and the paper for it due tomorrow which is currently only half done) and was still making plots last night. As a matter of fact, I was still making plots this morning. I skipped the gym, took a shower, and headed off to the lab. I finished writing the presentation ten minutes before I had to present. It went fairly well considering I had absolutely no practice with it.
Afterwards a few of us hung out talking, dispersing some of the stress that has been building up. Then a few of us headed up to the lab to start writing our papers. Every ten minutes or so, someone would call out the number of words their paper consisted of, and the rest of us would follow suit with our updates. It was slow going.
The girls left early and I stayed a little later to get more work done. I got distracted with processing more data to make more plots. This will actually be a section of my thesis, so the analysis will go on through the summer.... but this paper needs to be in tomorrow night by midnight. So I need to stop analyzing the data and just present what I've got.
It looks like I'll have the opportunity to intern with a company down in San Diego this summer that could possibly set me up for something long term... which means I will have made it. I may even move down as soon as next spring, finish writing my thesis down there, and then come back and defend in May.
This fall I'll be taking two classes, researching and writing for my thesis, processing data for NASA, and possibly continuing to work on projects for this company in San Diego. It's going to be a little rough. But worth it.
I left the lab early today to get some groceries (7:30, which is normally when I'm getting ready for bed) and also grabbed a bottle of Jameson for my desk at the lab. Then I realized I also will need something to drink it out of, since all I have at the lab is a coffee cup. I stopped by Marshalls and scored a stemless plastic wine glass with a seahorse faux-etched in it for $2 (not for the whiskey, but for any wine I might also drink there) and a small Pyrex beaker. Being a grad student is a little rough, you gotta be prepared. Today one of the undergrads discovered a hidden stash of beer in one of the classrooms...which belongs to another undergrad. I've heard about that stash.
I really love the idea of drinking whiskey out of a Pyrex beaker (being a scientist and all) but am also a little wary because it will be on or in my desk that is situated in an actual lab that does indeed have a beaker or two lying around that should probably not be used for drinking. Maybe I'll hide it in my desk when it's not in use.
I went home with all my goodies, washed half the dishes, ate, and started getting ready for bed. I heard a knock on the door. Victor and Juan were offering me eternal life. I told them I was Buddhist. Victor reiterated eternal life, and I shook my head and thanked him and told him it didn't exist. "It's free!" He insisted. I turned him down again and they moved to the next door.
Brushing my teeth, I heard a text come in. Probably one of the many friends and family I have been ignoring this week in an effort to magically make plots and presentations and papers appear. I've neglected a lot of things. Cleanliness is one of them. So is speaking to people.
I checked my message. It was my advisor, who has not sent me a text message in over a year, asking how the presentation went (he's very excited about my data). I told him it went well minus all the "ums" and going over time and now was halfway through the paper.
"What paper?" He asked. And then, "You should go to UCSB for a PhD".
"The presentation was just part of it. There's a paper that goes with it."
"Really" Really you should get your PhD? Or Really, you have to write a paper?
So as any good grad student would, I responded: "Lol. Um. Have you been drinking?"
"Of course, but that's not why I think so. Omg....so cool people. Btw, your sims look similar to Sundowner WRF sims from student here. Get that paper done. We can talk later. Just planting the seed."
I started to respond with the other plots I had made up today, along with the ones I planned to do as soon as I get all my stuff done that's due tomorrow, along with the take-home-final for another class that's due on Tuesday, and the three lab reports (complete with computer programming) that are all due by Wednesday. I erased it and sent "Ok."
In science, you have to get to everything before someone else does. I have to publish my findings before someone else does. Data needs to be analyzed, papers need to be read, papers need to be written. On top of all the other things I need to get done.
The prospect of finishing next spring and having a job lined up in San Diego has been driving me through this week. I feel like it's all coming together.
Or.....I could just keep going. Get my PhD.
But what for? Indeed...what for. For the research. I know why he thinks I should get my PhD. Because I ran a model simulation of a case study and it produced interesting results, and it interested me and it's super awesome! Yes, science is cool. Research is cool (kinda). But for crying out loud. I'm staring so hard at that light at the end of the tunnel that my eyes are starting to burn. I'm getting impatient and restless and am more than ready to move down to San Diego and have whatever might resemble a normal life (or, you know, not).
So tomorrow while I am typing away at my desk trying to get that paper done and my take-home-exam done, my advisor will walk in and try to sell me on a PhD. But I will be armed with whiskey and a Pyrex beaker. I will be listening to Elle King Radio on Pandora, kicking ass and taking names in computer code, trying to figure out what paper that was I read that mentioned Froude numbers and mountain height, transitions from subcritical to supercritical flow, and dreaming about having a beer at Point Loma Seafoods with my breaded scallops and french fries while I stare off into the harbor and try not to get a sunburn.
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